Monday, December 12, 2011

The Worst Fries on the Planet

Well how many of you love French Fries?

I know too many who do, and you count me in that list too. But what happened today, was probably the worst that can happen to any foodie. The worst torture of its kind. My fries sucked. Can you imagine??  L

Okay, so let me start from the top. I met a friend of mine today, and we did not have too much time on our plate, so we thought we’d enter the first restaurant we came across. Call it our bad luck, or one of God’s pious schemes, we saw Nirulas.(I know, what WAS I thinking?)

So, we know about the Soup Nirulas is in, but launching a Tomato and Chicken soup, and designing your shop to coax customers into ordering the same when you don’t have it in stock is stupid. Simply put, Pathetic. How can you not have a simple SOUP in stock, when you just launched it? Why did you launch it in the first place when you can’t have customers trying it? Or are you too afraid of the feedback, you’d get, that you’re just serving it to your employees?

Getting over all that thought, I ordered some things around their largest size fries and waited for the stuff to show up, and believe me it took ages. I almost aged by a century and grew some 100 strands of white hair, when the food finally arrived.

Checkout the quantity of fries we got for 50 bucks. Yes!!!! I’m Not kidding you, this picture was taken when we were four fries down. And boy it tasted like dog shit. I haven’t had the pleasure of tasting Dog shit in my life, ever, but Nirulas, you made me do it today. I owe you for this once in a lifetime experience. The fries were undercooked, returned them, and got undercooked tasteless fries, yet again. Brilliant. My 8 year old cousin could cook better than your best cook.

We somehow managed with the other food items, and asked for the Feedback form. I wrote “You Suck, Nirulas”.

I also told the manager to his face, “Your food, sucks!!”

He said “Nahi sir, bas cooks thode experienced nahi hain.”

“I wouldn’t call people who forget to salt undercooked fries at a restaurant inexperienced, I call them dumb and stupid.”

With which, I left him.

Their flat cokes do deserve special mention, but I must say, the fries stole the show. Their pizzas are non-existent, and so much is the extent of cost cutting, that napkins are one by four napkins.

I feel, there is nothing Nirulas can do with its current attitude of displeasing customers. If it wants to make some dough and enjoy customer loyalty (God forbid), it needs to pay people for eating its food, not charge them.

Customers would be better off making their own food, at a Nirula’s restaurant, atleast they won’t run the risk of consumption of stale or undercooked food. People wouln’t eat at Nirula’s if you gave them complimentary Blowjobs, you dumb fucks, make your food taste better.

And Lastly, eat a plate of Chhole Kulche from that neighbourhood thela wala ,but don’t tease diarrhoea with Nirula’s food. Nobody’s gut is as strong as their Food Inspection Manager’s, who if is alive, needs to be shot dead on sight.

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